Saturday, August 02, 2008

My Pursuit of Happyness

So I decided after two days of drinking this week, I should prolly lay low on this Friday night. Between driving to Charlotte, buying a bed (finally), and buying dinner for a crazy girl, I needed to save a little money. So I went to Blockbuster and got a movie. I have a $15 gift card to waste so why not? The movie selection is a bit bleak for me but I narrow it down to I Am Legend and The Pursuit Of Happyness, two movies I have been meaning to see. I choose I Am Legend and drive home. Well wouldn't ya know it, right when I get home, The Pursuit Of Happyness is on a movie channel I get in 20 minutes. Guess I know have another movie to watch by 8/9 by noon.

If you've never seen this movie, do yourself a favor and watch it. The movie is well-acted, produced, directed and written. It is based on a true story and what a story it is. Truly inspirational for anyone.

As I was watching the movie, I started thinking though: how is my pursuit of happyness going? (By the way, I know it is spelled happiness but I want to stay consistent) As a guy who just entered the proverbial "real world", it is quite a question to ponder. In college, it was never something to really think about. Honestly, each day was a pursuit to happyness. You know, the pursuit to get drunk and have a great time (sorry OU for wasting that money...not really). But after college, the pursuit really begins.

But before I could analyze the pursuit, I have to define happyness. And that is a tough one to answer too. Every time someone asks me about long-term goals, I always say is to just have a job. I'm a step-as-a-guy person when it comes to this job thing. My profession is just too volatile for me to plan too far ahead. I mean, something like ESPN would be amazing but not gonna lie, I've never considered Bristol, CT as my future home nor happyness. During my phone interviews, I answered the question by saying a large market local station doing sports. Again, all vague answers because at the young age of 22, I don't know what my true happyness is yet.

I'm sure it involves having a family, a secure job and living in a nice neighborhood etal. I don't know where or when but that's where the pursuit part comes in. So far, as I sit in my one-bedroom apartment in Augusta, GA watching Shark Week on Discovery Channel HD, I am convinced my pursuit is rather slow. Not really speeding there but at a steady 25 MPH or so. Because I have no true long-term goal or definition of my happyness, I can't see how close or far I am. But at the present moment, I'm just happy on the road.

So how close are you to your happyness? Are you even in pursuit of it or have you given up? Are you waiting for an epiphany or act of God to get you jump-started or are you just burnt out and thinking of starting over?

For Chris Gardner in the movie, the pursuit was long, hard and a true test of his moral being. For me, the pursuit is fun. I say this now because I figure it can't get worse than where I am now. Not saying that where I am now is miserable or that I am in need of help but my hope (and goal) is to have the next job be better than the first. That's what make my pursuit of whatever my happyness is fun. Because I know it will only get better. From my measly salary to a decent salary. From one-bedroom apt to...well, a bigger one-bedroom apt. From a city of Augusta's size to a city of maybe Charlotte or Nashville's size. Chasing down that small hope is fun. That's why I still check tvjobs.com everyday, even though I am comfortably in one right now. I like to think ahead at what could be.

But in the end, I still don't know when that happyness will come. It could be 20 years from now. It could be 20 months. I honestly don't know. But for now, I am going to enjoy every second of my pursuit of it because once I reach it, I want to be able to look back at that pursuit and tell myself not only was it long, hard and tough, but it was a ton of fun.

4 comments:

Jake Young said...

That's my boy. Good post. I think if you just try to make each day some sort of improvement on the last and you can look back and feel like you gave it a genuine effort with some success, you'll be happy with where you are. At least that's how I feel.

Luke said...

"not only was it long, tough and hard, but it was a lot of fun" ... that's what she said

EricHug said...

That was a good blog but your journalism skills need some work.

That's what make my pursuit of whatever my happyness is fun."

- quoting Matt Barnes

Anonymous said...

you're starting to sound like me...one thing to keep in mind is happyness shouldn't be a destination - it should be ever-present in the journey.

and you can't say shit about my comment cuz you got just as philosophical in your post, probably more.

good post - better than your 13-day rant...dear jesus